Oops!

It’s May 5th and I’ve already failed to write two days. Guess what! I can’t do anything about it now. All I can do is get back up and start again.

That’s what happens when we fail. We have to get back up and try again.

Yesterday was the last game of our soccer season. One of the little guys on the team, Jordan, got hit in the stomach by the ball. He fell down and cried. I can’t blame him. He got hit pretty hard. When he came back to the bench, I asked him if he was ready to go back in. He said “no”. I told him we weren’t going to have his last play of the season be him getting hurt and talked him into going back in.

Even if you decide to quit, you shouldn’t let your last act at something you are trying to do be a failure on your part. You have to try once more. You don’t want to create a habit of quitting on failure.

I should write two more pieces through the month so that I’ve still written 31 pieces by the end of the month. Take that Resistance.

Thank You For…

“Thank your for your [comment, email, message, feedback]…”

I’m beginning to think that any email or letter, and probably voice mail, that begins “Thank you” is part of the corporate douche baggery lexicon. It’s right up there with “We apologize”. Is that how you apologize? If I mean it, I usually say “I’m sorry”.

If there is a Corporate Douche Baggery Dictionary, both of these phrases have to be in there.

“We understand” is another one. Any time anyone is so careful in how they word something that they find themselves using any of these phrases they should really ask themselves “Would this make me feel better about the situation?” By the way if you answered anything other than “No!” you need to go back and take classes on being a human.

Instead of “Thank you for your…” you should say “You’re right. We are jerks. Unfortunately for you we have made our decision and here are our reasons for doing so.”

Another favorite and I’ve slipped on this one a couple of times is “I’m sorry I’ve offended you”. I call this the douchebag apology. What that means is “I’m sorry you were offended”. It’s not accepting any responsibility for whatever upset the person. Depending on the particular offense, there are several ways this interaction could go. I personally like, “I hadn’t thought of it like that.”

I may have to write a Corporate Douche Baggery Dictionary.

Partners

I’ve decided to try to write something every day this month as an experiment and to try to form a new good habit. Hopefully I’ll publish something every day. It might be here. It might be elsewhere. If it’s not here, I will publish a link here.

There is a lot going through my mind today.

Best (and most appropriate) tweet I saw today:
@fmetalli: The Best Number Of Partners In A #Company Is Any Uneven Number Below 3

That is a pretty powerful and witty way of saying something. You can have more than one partner in a company, but the ground rules have to be very well defined. There was something that Seth Godin said about everyone in the group has to earn their shares. That doesn’t just mean show up and do a job. It means you have to earn your shares. No one gets a free ride. Not even the one providing the money for the venture. Am I wrong?

Never go into a business venture with anyone without having the exit plan in place. I’ve made this mistake twice. You could even say I made it three times. I may be about to make it a fourth time. On second thought, maybe I won’t.

Then again, maybe it makes the most sense to stick to any uneven number below three.